Dealing With Problems

Solutions: 

Examples and Methods

for Breaking Free

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Breaking Free > Anger, Fury, Rage 

Breaking Free > Controlling Sexuality

Breaking Free > Toxic Relationships

Preface

Over the years  I have read a number of articles written by health professionals which stated that most sickness is psychosomatic; that is, what is in the mind (psyche) affects what happens to the body (soma). One doctor I spoke with claimed that up to 95% of sicknesses were so caused.

Read on to see real-life, breaking-free examples, some being very simple, of problems which were never resolved and which led to major issues later on. 

The simple techniques described below have had a 100% success rate in resolving complex social and painful medical situations during personal ministry. The techniques described should not require the presence of a third party - in other words, you can "do it yourself."

Translations; Kiswahili

When we do things in God's preferred way the results are amazing.

This on-the-spot result happens continually in text, as well as in face-to-face ministry.  Note the timeline in the compiled screenshots above.

1. Introduction

When we make mistakes the enemy, that is, the devil and the demonic spirits attached to him, are given power over us to do us harm. This harm can take many forms, some of which are listed several sections below as conditions based in the mind, and includes sickness, poor health, mental conditions, accidents, loss, destruction of relationships, property, business or belongings, and death. (A thorough treatment of this issue can be found in the Menu article Mistakes.)

If we are the ones who committed the offences then any of those things listed above could happen to us.

One thing that confuses many people is that when they are offended against (in other words, someone has caused harm or done something wrong to them), they also suffer, not just physically from what happened if it was an assault, but also mentally and, quite often, from other physical conditions which seem to follow on. 

In the last 8 years we have ministered healing to several thousand people in church, school or conference settings, on the streets and through text messaging apps and phone calls. When people don’t get healed or released on the spot, we have found consistently that there was an issue in their past that they had not dealt with correctly. Once they dealt with that issue then healing would happen either immediately or, in the case of some conditions, within a few days. 

2. Examples of Mistakes Leading to Health or Other Issues

Example 1 - Professional man in his thirties, unemployed for 18 months and had run out of money, wife starting to date other men in spite of them having a young child together. (Ministry via Messenger texting.) 

This man admitted that when he was at university he had behaved very badly towards many young women students. While I could guess what he meant I did not ask for details or require them for God to correct the problem. 

After confessing to his mistakes before God and acknowledging that he should not have behaved in that way, he was set free in a way that he could feel and sense. A new job in his field took about 3 months. 

Example 2 - Kenyan man in his fifties, in considerable pain from edema, the swelling of his lower body because of the retention of body fluid. His condition was so acute that his penis had retracted inside his body so that he could no longer urinate properly, either. While waiting for ministry he had wet all down his trouser leg. The edema and pain had been with him for about 6 months. (Ministry in person at a conference.)

When the usual, simple ministry brought no change in his pain, after questioning he revealed that a neighbour had stolen and sold his kuku (chicken) and refused to give him any money from the sale of it. 

After admitting before God that he should not have allowed enmity to develop with his neighbour in spite of what had happened, and after turning and facing the direction where the offence took place and, in the spirit, saying to the neighbour who was not present that he would like to be friends again, the pain left him. Within three days the edema had gone and he was completely well again.


Example 3 - Young woman, just 18, badly beaten and raped during a home invasion. Unable to even give me that information, asked me to get the basic details from a friend of hers. Had despaired of life, was angry, suffering from depression, anxiety and more. (Ministry via text over 18 months.)

After dealing with the assault issues and problems arising from that she was able to function better, although she could not relate to men at college because of anger. I found out some background information from her: due to a poor relationship with her father she had moved in to live with relatives in another city where she was attacked, and she had been calling the male relative, “Dad.” 

We dealt with anger and other problems as they arose. However, even many months later she still could not refer to anything that happened on the evening in question, and deal with it, nor was she willing to acknowledge that, had she dealt correctly with the problem with her father rather than running away, she would not have been anywhere near where the offence took place. She gradually moved from being antagonistic towards men in general into a relationship with a married man and became pregnant. Some unhealthy, illogical attitudes also surfaced, such as the idea that her new baby would grow up and give her the love she craved and felt she needed. Her 'marriage' was not working very well, either. 

At this stage I realised that I should have pushed harder long before to get her to confront the real issue, her relationship with her father. Once I repented and apologised before God for my own timidity and lack of action They were quickly able to open up a way for me to help her deal with her relationship with her father. She acknowledged the problem was hers, and that she should have never been where she was on the night she was attacked. She was set free after she forgave herself for her mistakes and could now talk freely about it and, more importantly, move on in life and make wise choices. 

Her attitudes changed almost instantly and she became a successful businesswoman, as well as a good mother in a productive marriage. 


Example 4 - Man in the US with chronic back pain, in his 80s. (Ministry via phone call.)

He had had the back pain for at least ten years, and pain killers did not help much. When he held out his hands before God the pain diminished a little, and then remained the same. When questioned about any relationship issues with anyone he admitted that he had been quite harsh with his wife over the years, and that he would like to stop and have God help him treat her with the gentleness and calmness she deserved. He apologised before God and also to his wife, who was in the room with him. 

This time the pain left completely and he texted me some months later to say how happy he was to be pain-free and released in that way.


Example 5 - Middle-aged man with pain all through his body for at least ten years. (During and after morning church service.) 

During the service there had been little to no change in his condition. I went up to him as the service was ending. He acknowledged that there had been a disagreement of sorts with someone, but wasn’t sure that anything could be done about it. He was a supervisor and had once written a report about an incident in which the other man was involved. As a result of the report the other man had lost his job, which was not the intention of the man standing before me. He had not spoken to the man afterwards, who  had since died. This is not a problem for healing, as events soon showed.

I led him in a simple apology before God and then had him face the direction in which the incident occurred. He apologised to the man as if he was standing in front of him - in a sense he was - and the pain left his body within a few seconds. 


Example 6 - Woman with 6 year old boy with badly inflamed adenoids, loud snoring, for 12 months. The mother asked me initially for money for medicine but I declined, as always, since it is more exciting to deal with the problem in God’s way. (Via Facebook Messenger.) 

At my request the woman held her hands over her son, told Inflammation to go, and the snoring stopped for a day or so. After asking some questions she revealed that her husband had left her several years earlier and she was raising the children by herself. She also acknowledged that they would argue before he would beat her, and that this would happen in front of the children. (When I asked if he beat her she said, with some surprise, “How did you know?”) I explained that, even though the children were not personally involved, they were witnessing something that was very traumatic for them, and for which many children feel unduly responsible for. It took some days for her to realise that this was not appropriate behaviour in front of children and that, at the very least, she needed to apologise before God and before the children for what she and their father had done. 

She eventually agreed to do so after her son’s condition worsened and became more of a problem at school. As she followed my written text instructions and apologised before God and to her absent husband for arguing with him in front of the children, and for allowing physical violence to develop, her son, who was sleeping and snoring loudly in the next room and unable to hear physically what his mother was saying, suddenly stopped snoring. At the same time his older brother was talking in his sleep, saying, "It's ok, it's ok." When she checked the youngest the next morning the inflammation had gone and when I checked some months later he was doing fine. 

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3. These examples demonstrate a recurring pattern:




4. If you realise, like many others already, that you have missed this truth of God's Creation (the equality of men and women) and/or you realise that you have been mishandling His word, here is how to start putting things to right.  

"Repent" simply means "to change your mind." Once we change our mind changed actions can and will follow.  

"Confess" means to say what we have done wrong. 

"Contrition" means to be sorry for an action or thought.  

When we use these three tools together we see people set free of all sorts of sickness, pain, misfortune and error. We recommend that you stand and hold out your hands before God, palms upturned and open to receive, as you do this. 

You could say something like this before God, using the parts that apply to you:  

"Father/Papa/Lord God (use the term or word that works for you, or use another term you like),  

"I'm sorry that I have been thinking the wrong way about the relationship and connection between men and women. I'm sorry that I have misunderstood scripture and Your plan. I want to change, I want to agree with you in everything that I do. I want to now treat women as equal. 

"Thank you, Jesus, for setting me free."  > "Asante Yesu kwa kuniweka huru."

If we don't deal correctly with bad things that we do or bad things that happen to us then the enemy get advantage over us to do us harm. This harm could be in many forms, but common ways of bringing harm to people because of wrong actions result in sickness, pain, accident, loss, destruction and/or death. This is covered in much more detail on the website - www.thechurch.solutions/mistakes - in the section Enemy-Attack.

5. If you have actually done things that took advantage over another man, woman or child, especially in the form of verbal, physical or sexual assault, then this is the way to start dealing with those issues.  

We recommend that you stand and hold out your hands before God, palms upturned and open to receive, and face the direction in which the offense took place, or if the person involved is alive, face the direction in which you think they would be right now. 

You could say something like this before God, using the parts that apply to you: 

"Father/Papa/Lord God (use the term or word that works for you, or use another term you like),  

"I'm sorry that I ... (name the thing that you did and name the person involved, even if they are no longer alive). I should not have done that, it was very wrong. I will not do that again. 

"Thank you Jesus for setting me free in Your blood."  

Where possible say similar words to the victim in real life, without suggesting or apportioning any blame to them. (When apologising in this way to a person there is no need to add the last, 'Thank you Jesus' part.)  

This last part, where we don't try to blame the other person for anything that happened, is most important! That part is between them and God. Only when we accept responsibility for something we have done wrong, without blaming someone else, can we be set free.  


6. The Part That Forgiveness Plays:  


We do not need to ask someone, anyone, neither God nor man, to forgive us

When we ask someone to forgive us we are saying or accusing them that they have not already forgiven us; we are subtly saying that they themselves have done something wrong. This places the victim of our original bad action at a disadvantage to us. This is not godly, because we are trying to shift some blame to them rather than taking responsibility for what we did wrong.  

Instead, forgiveness is what we apply automatically (or after some solid thinking about the situation), whenever someone does something wrong to us. Forgiveness is the act or thought of saying, no matter what the circumstances, one or the other of these two things: 

 

i) "They didn't know how bad their action would be for me, so I am going to release them in my heart and feelings." This compares to the attitude of Jesus on the Cross, when He said, "Father, forgive them, for they don't know what they are doing." (Luke 23:34) However, we do not need to ask God to forgive the person who offended against us, we just have to release them ourselves.  


ii) In the second situation, where someone has set out to deliberately harm us, we adopt the same attitude that Joseph used to handle the situation with his brothers, who originally wanted to kill him but then sold him into slavery. "You meant evil against me, but God meant it for good." (Genesis 50:20) In other words, God is able to make all things, no matter what the circumstances, work together for good when we handle the situation(s) in His way. (Romans 8:28)  

In this way, once we release the other person we will also be released from the penalties that the enemy are able to apply to us. These penalties can include depression (feeling bad about ourselves or our situation), oppression (feeling bad about others and wanting to harm them or seek revenge), paranoia (where we think other people are trying to harm us), dissociation (where, under the stress or pain of a very traumatic event we blank out our mind to minimise the pain, with the result that a part of our personality splits off and resurfaces at seemingly random intervals), memory loss, bipolar disorder (where you experience feelings of elation and excitement, followed by feelings of great sadness or depression), addiction and many sicknesses and diseases, which are based in our mind or feelings.  

Forgiveness is the attitude of release that we hold towards someone who has harmed us. Forgiveness does not mean that the offender should be released from any legal penalty for their actions, especially if there is a chance that they could offend again against you or someone else.  

Remember this, though, that in this life we will not always see justice for ourselves, our family members, friends, or anyone else. However, in the age to come there is a judgment from God which will deal with both the good and the bad that we and others have done, and which will produce a varying reward based on our actions in this short lifetime. See 1 Corinthians 3:8-15 


Unforgiveness by a 'victim' cannot harm a person who has genuinely apologised for their mistake(s). Proverbs 26:2 says, "A curse without a cause (or reason) shall not settle on you." That cause or reason is removed with a genuine apology and efforts to restore or make restitution.


7. Instead of asking for forgiveness we are meant to do the thing which many people find quite hard to do, to say “Sorry”.

After addressing the person by name, say:  

"I'm sorry, I should not have done that (name what you did wrong without providing an excuse or alibi) to...(name the person out loud if you are by yourself, quietly if you are in a group). I won't do that again."  

Don't let this become a formula response - it must be real and genuine, from the heart. When we consider what we did wrong in this way we will generally feel great remorse and sorrow for our actions as Holy Spirit works in us, through our conscience. 

There is no need to explain why you responded or acted in that way unless you are able to explain why you are affected negatively, and how you will overcome that. The focus must remain on what you did wrong, not on what the other person did to trigger your mistake. (In other words we do not say to someone, "I was carried away by your revealing top and tight jeans." All of us are capable of exercising self-control in any situation.)  

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8a. The Fake Apology

There are few things worse than a fake apology, because it attempts to shift blame back to the victim of our bad behaviour under the guise of being a genuine attempt at reconciliation. In other words, during the apology we mention what it was that the other person did wrong, in our eyes, at least.

"I'm sorry I made you angry" is just one example of a fake apology.

As part of our apology we accuse the other person of doing something wrong themselves, by mentioning the way they responded badly to us.

It Is not appropriate to attempt, nor is it even possible, to apologise for the way someone else responds to something we did or said; we can only apologise for our own mistakes or actions.

8b. The Genuine Apology Solves Arguments Before They Start

We generally get upset when someone accuses us of words or actions which, in their eyes at least, were bad.

We tend to get upset because there usually is an element of truth in what they are saying, but we feel that it is being blown way out of proportion. Think this through beforehand; most occasions are repeats of something that has gone on before. Be ready for it.

Here Is some advice from Jesus which is well-worth considering:

"Agree with your adversary quickly, while you are in the way with him, that your opponent may not deliver you to the judge, and the judge deliver you to the officer, and you be cast into prison."  Matthew 5:25.

Metaphorically speaking, that simply says to not get involved In arguments, because the other person might win and a judgment of some sort or other, in the spiritual realm at least, be entered against you. 

Here is a proven method for handling these situations:

I. Look for the kernel of truth and accept it, no matter how painful or distorted it might seem.

II. Without making any argument about the exaggeration, the unfairness or injustice of it all, agree with that element of truth. If your wife says, "You are a lousy husband," pause briefly as if considering the accusation, and then agree by apologising (everyone can always do better at anything!) something like this:

"I'm sorry, I know I can do better, and I want to."

If she continues, "You're a lousy father," then examine what you could do to Improve, and suggest that after apologising again:

"I'm sorry, I could do better, I should spend more time with the children," or choose whatever action you could improve in.

If she says, "You don't bring home enough money," and you are not wasting your pay packet on frivolous items, apologise and offer a solution, or ask if she has a suggestion.

III. By this time the antagonist Is so shocked at agreement Instead of argument that they run out of further negative comments. 

IV. Whatever you do, do not ignore the temporary cease-fire, or enjoy the temporary lull in battle. Press home the advantage: you can wait for another time (don't leave it too long!) or invite further conversation about the issues raised.

Adapt this method to suit whatever situation you are in. It works!

9. If you have been the victim of verbal, physical or sexual assault  

This can be a complicated matter with many victims requiring extensive counselling, with some not readily seeing a resolution. Here is a simple method for gaining release. 

i) If you were willingly involved at the beginning and later changed your mind but the other person would not take notice:  

ii) If you were held captive or completely unable to remove yourself from the situation because of tender age or some incapacity:  

1 Corinthians 10:13 teaches that "there is no testing situation that has laid hold of you which is not common to mankind;" In other words, someone, somewhere else has also gone through the exact same sort of situation - someone else will understand. (Almost any time we read the English word tempt we can substitute the English word test - it is the same Greek word.) 

The verse continues: "but God is faithful, He will not let you be tested beyond your ability..." In other words, God knows your limitations and will not let you be overwhelmed. Unfortunately, some people in pain do not know or acknowledge this truth and give up before they find the solution. Never give up!  

Finally: "...but with the testing situation He will provide a way out." God does not provide the test, and He always provides a way out. Here is one way out that has proved to be extremely successful:  

Stand and hold out your hands before God, palms upturned and open to receive, and face the direction in which the offense took place, or if the person involved is alive, face the direction in which you think they would be right now. like this:  

"Father/Papa/Lord God (use the term or word that works for you, or use another term you like)

"I am sorry that I have let myself be overcome by what happened to me. I release (name the person or group if you can, otherwise "those people" will identify them in the spirit well enough) from the offense and from my life, from feelings of revenge, wanting justice and compensation. I release them from the hurt and pain I felt at the time and since then.  

"Above all, Lord God/Father/Papa, (use the term or word that works for you, or use another term you like), I release them to you for forgiveness and blessing, that they, too, might be restored.  

"Thank you, Jesus, for setting me free."  

As you do this, after you do this, just wait quietly a few moments, twenty or thirty seconds, maybe more, for God to do something in you. On some occasions a change will be noticed the next time you wake up from a good sleep.  


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Solutions (This page) > Examples and Methods for Breaking Free

Breaking Free > Anger, Fury, Rage 

Breaking Free from Toxic Relationships

One young woman's story

Breaking Free from Controlling Sexuality

One young man's story



Vengeance is Mine 

Judgment will take hold of you

Anger slays the foolish man

Fake apologies - ninsert as